Meeting with family.

"How will they be? What will be thier expectations from me? Will they accept me the way I want them to? How will they be different form my natural family?" Hundreds of questions were running into my mind like a storm of confusion when I landed in Detroit Airport from Chicago airport. It was a 45 minute flight from Chicago and I was with two other exchange students. One from Pakistan and one from Mali. The plane was very teeny tiny. This was funny, because it was the smallest plane I've seen but it was cute. My cane of pepsi was shaking into my hands while I was thinking that finally I've reached to my destination. My exchange year begins NOW!____________
         As I was going to get my lugage, I saw my host mom hoding a sign board which had my name on it. I went to her with a bit nervousness and excitement thinking how will she welocme me? should I hug her? or she'll find it bad? I had NO IDEA.. But thank god, she was good at it. She hugged me and welcomed with a warm smile on her face. My host Dad was waiting in the car outside the aiport. I was waiting for my suitcase to come and it didn't! We went to the authority and they assured us that it will come later ad they will call us. I was a little worried but I beleived in American Airlines so waited patiently.
  When I was in the car, they told me that they are going to take me to Ann Arbor, a big town near my teeny-tiny town called Dexter. We went there at a restraunt to meet my host brother who is 26 years old ad his girlfriend. My host sister who is 21 years old was out of town. I was excited to meet my brother. The meeting with mom and dad was great (atleast, that's my view. Hope they also think like that), now let's see how it goes with my brother and his girlfriend.After a drive of 1 hour we reached Ann Arbor, which is famous becuse of the University of Michigan. It is a beautiful city. The food was delicious. During eating we kepton talking and they were glad to see that I wasn't hesitating. I am a "Chatter box". I can never live without talking, they found it fascinating and it worked out well.
 When we reached the house there was a little pomeranian dog of my sister whose name is cookie. I was really scared of dogs, especially when they are jumping and barking. He was doing it. I got too scared and started screaming. That was funny for my family but it made me nervous. The house was beautiful and big. This was a kind of house I always wanted to live in. So I was happy to be there. My mom gave me a little tour of the house and told me the things I needed to know. I got my luggage and started settling up into my room. It was nice and peaceful. i like my room. I asked my mom the questions we were told to ask in our orientations, which we had before coming to the U.S. It was good to feel that "the family meeting" part went good. I was satisfied to see that these people were not rude or strict. :)
All the house rules were explained to me and I felt okay with all of them. It always depends on your host family that what type of rules they have. You have to follow them since you are living in their house. Being an exchange student, you are supposed to be flexible in every condition. This is the time you have to prove how strong you are! My family is not so strict, but I expected them to be very strict and I was thinking to be obidient about the rules.
Neat nicy.. I went to bed at night. I surely missed my natural family but started praying and them I felt good. The first days will be tough, but after you get used to your new life. :)

Sacred storytelling

On Sunday November 11, 2011. we went for An enrichment activity in Ypsilanti, Michigan with AFS exchange students. This storytelling was about stereotypes of people about different religions, for example, as you hear the word "MUSLIM" a word pops up in your mind saying, "TERRORIST", for "Hindus" you just think of "Tribal people, worshiping cows and dancing along fire-- in short, crazy".
                                             Well, I am a Hindu myself and I do not agree with these thoughts at all. We are not like this. But the other people will never understand that even if I shout at the top of my voice. People from other religions make fun of you and bully you and the worst part is that,  you can't do anything about that. These feelings are much more painful than they seem.
                             I am a Hindu but I am from a Muslim country Pakistan. Despite the old conflicts between Hindus and Muslims, we are honored and respected in Pakistan. We are given every right we want to have. We worship, celebrate and do whatever we want and the government provides us security. There are always some people who will be narrow-minded and extremists. Though I haven't met any such adult yet in my country but when I was in my middle school, I was bullied by my Muslim classmates for being a Hindu, I cried, complaint and suffered a lot during that time. It was horrible. I tried my best to convince my classmates but since they were just middle school kids, they were literally, morally, mentally IMMATURE. But when I was in my high school, there was nothing like that. I was the only Hindu in my whole class of 60 people. My class mares were all Muslims but they were very nice. They respected my religion and wanted to know about it. They not only invited me to their religious events but also came to my religious festivals and loved it. I was glad to have such friends who were mature, respectful, tolerant and polite.I wonder what is the difference between my middle-school class mates and high school friends and the only thing I could think of was Education. High school friends were educated and the middle school mates were not so educated and immature.It actually begins in homes. These things are taught by their parents to them. Since they just follow what their parents say, if they are taught by educated parents they act sophisticated. If the'r parents are narrow-minded, the children also start thinking stupidly. Sad but true!
                         Talking about the stereotypes that I had for Americans were that, "They just lock us up thinking that we are TERRORISTS, without even any evidence they will imprison you, even if you are innocent. They are cruel and heartless people . See what they did to Iraq and etc.etc." This was no more into my mind when I arrived here and safely spent 4 months here. It was not like the way we hear about it. I was glad to find out that my stereotypes were actually all fake.
                          When I attended the Sacred storytelling conference, I saw that they were talking about the stereotypes about different religions and saying that these are all fake and meaningless. They talked about the ways to make the relationships better between different religions and respecting differences, valuing diversity and tolerance. It was so surprising to see that all those people who organized that event and participated in it were all Americans. This made the thing obvious to me that American do respect diversity and they are themselves working to make it better. They are teaching other Americans to be nice and wise. They are telling others to spread peace. It makes me believe that Every American is not a racist and extremist. There are some intelligent people, who care and think and want to make world a better place! This is what you learn during your exchange year,you experience diversity. You learn about the culture of the country and about the people you are living with and most important, you learn that all your stereotypes were nothing but fake!
--" I never realized that Americans ever think that they should over come their stereotypes and respect diversity and tolerance. Its great to be here. Great job", said by me (Sonam Chawla from Pakistan).
--"I learnt that we should respect each other. We should never bully anyone from any different religion and live with peace!", says Ayub Khan from India.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FCeH-svm4Nc&feature=youtu.be

Lonliness

The sound of the horrible thoughts which my mind was shouting on me, squished me into a small little coward ball. Folding my both hands around my knees ad hiding my face inside it. I felt my body shivering. My heart was hammering so loud that it was trying to force itself out of my chest and get apart form my body. I felt the sweating drops falling form my forehead to my hands even if it was snowing outside in Michigan. My hair were all tangled into each other and I didn't care about anything---what difference does it make if I look presentable or not, I just wished to get free from the pathetic thoughts I was getting. Too afraid to even look up and come out of my room, I was burying myself into a corner of my small room. Looked like all the water in my body had decided to come out through my eyes tonight. It was just uncontrollable, as more as I was trying to get through it, the more it was getting over me!

                                Realizing that it had been a while since I was in my panic attacks, I searched for my cell phone in the cold, dark, messy room of mine. It was on my bed. I flipped it open and looked for the time. It was 2 in the morning, but it didn't surprise me at all. I was expecting it to be more later than that. Realizing that it and thinking that I have to go to school tomorrow, I decided to try to sleep. Neglecting the circumstances of the torn feeling that I was going through. The struggle of my own mind with myself convincing me that it was my fault and I should wear the spectacles of their eyes to see through their vision, I felt helpless.
           Probably, a sleep was a better idea than to cry and keep on mourning about my pathetic life. I tried to get up and reach for my bed which was full of my clothes scattered all over it. I didn't care about the tidiness or any organization. Just ignored and went to sleep, praying to the God and waiting the new sun will bring new hopes with it and I will be able to survive from this LONLINESS!

Travelling- The moments I will never forget..

As the days were coming closer, i felt tensed and loosing my strength but remember, this is the time when you have to be more stronger and wiser.
Packing was a big head-ache. Here are some tips for packing your suitcases:
1- Be selective and objective.
2. Think about the weight.
3. Take passports, tickets and necessary papers in a separate purse.
4. Take light and really necessary stuff in a hand carry.
5. Make sure you can lift all your bags by yourself.
And be confident! ;)
The flight from Karachi to Bahrain Airport was just one hour long but the stay at Bahrain was 16 hours long. Now we were all tired and sleepy after staying whole night awake at Karachi Airport, it was like a bird looking for a shelter in the rain. While these stays, people usually fall asleep. You have to be really careful while sleeping. You have to make sure that all your bags are around you and nobody is able to steal them or put any illegal thing inside your bag. This can get you into a big trouble. We all the Pakistani exchange students grabbed a pretty fancy tent at the Airport, which was representing the Arab culture to the tourists and slept all together in that big, beautiful tent. 50 people and one tent, sounds conjusted right? Exactly, we were squished with each other with no sense of ques or management. As we all lied down, the funny sounds of snores and whines started to distract me. This were obviously my friends who were also so tired that they were snoring and some were complaining but it was fine because even though the snores were so loud, it didn't really matter because we were all too sleepy to concentrate on anything.
   After sleeping for a while, we all woke up and moved to Mc Donalds for our lunch. It was a big great International Airport. Everything there was amazing. it was full of people too. People from all around the world. Since we were wearing our program shirts, our shirts got attention of every visitor out there. So, here's what you should not do:
1- Don't talk to any stranger.
2. If they ask about the program , politely guide them for your manager with you but never tell anything by yourself.
3. Be with at least 4 people. To avoid getting lost or left behind.
4. Don't go anywhere alone. If you do, inform your friends.
And you'll be safe! :)
After Behrain, we moved to Kuwait and had a stay of 1 hour at Kuwait Airport. You should always make sure to take all your things with you while you change flights. Don't forget anything in the plane or at the Airports. After Kuwait, we went directly to Washington D.C. It was a 16 hour long flight. We slept throughout the whole way there. It was relaxing.
When we got off from the flight, we had a little interview with the American custom's officer. Outside the Airport, our YES program Alumni were waiting and took us to the hotel. It was unbelievable that I just reached to the U.S.A. The place that I always wanted to go. I was just feeling like a dream.
                       But this is just the beginning of the fun.. ;D

This Student life

This student life..

Lost in the numbers

Stuck with the variables,

Waiting for the sun of solutions to shine,

I’m looking for the best-fit line.

Oh no, Oh shoot,

I’m lost in my algebra book.

Learning the brain

And how it is framed,

Knowing about people’s behaviors

Confused between Cognitive and social perspectives

Oh boy, I’m becoming a psycho myself in this psychology book.

Descriptive, Imagery and clear word,

Creative writing is really weird.

Haiku is all sense-less,

How to write it,

I’m just clue-less.

Oh this student life,

Makes me cry,

So many challenges,

But I still enjoy.

I am a simple girl..

Broken like a plate,

Crushed like a fallen flower,

Waiting for a perfect soulmate,

And the blessings of God to shower,

I’m a simple girl just lost in the world.

As strong as rock,

As sweet as sugar,

Wearing a pink frock,

With a wish to change her fate,

I’m a simple girl,

Just lost in the world.

My Departure from Karachi to The US

It was a dark night with stars in the silent sky. At about 2 a.m we were in our car, driving to the airport. Our driver was driving it,My dad sitting next to him,I was laying my head on my mom's shoulders at the back seat,both of my younger brothers sitting next to me. We were all very quiet, everyone was upset and speechless because it was the night I was leaving home and going away from my family and friends. I was coming to the US for my exchange program and they all were extremely happy about that before but as the days came closer to my flight they all were feeling sad because they won't be able to meet me for about a whole year.

The past days were going on in my mind like a flash back film. I was remembering my days in the small town I belonged to and the troubles and obstacles that I faced in my way to the exchange program from a village of Pakistan. The town that had illiterate people who never used to get education themselves and not even allow others' to do so. How I got out from that place and made my way to the US. Those sarcastic comments of the people that, “you can't do this. You are form a small town. You are not good enough to pass the tests and get qualified.” And my mom's love protecting me from that sarcastic world like a beautiful angel. As I remembered that I was thinking that I'll miss her a lot. I was lost in my thoughts and my mom lifted my face up and looked at me with a shine in her eyes which were filled with tears. As she was looking at me I realized that I actually had been crying and tears were rolling down from eyes to my cheeks but I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't realize that. She wiped up my tears and hugged me and I felt like I am at the most safest place in the world. I closed my eyes and jut felt the warmth of that hug. Nothing can be more comfortable and relieving than mom's hug. Then she started advising me that “ eat your meal on time, sleep well, don' worry for anything” said my mom. And I was just saying “don't worry I will fine”. I was trying to make her feel relaxed and satisfied about me, But I knew that I can't be fine without her. This was sort of lieing to her but I had to be strong and control my feelings and thoughts and I remember how I was controlling my tears. I never felt so responsible before in my life.

It was really unbelievable for me that I was actually sad on the night I had waiting for. This was the thing I had been trying for since the whole year. I was damn excited about my trip to the US but as the time to departure was coming closer, I was feeling nervous and a little scared about it. It felt like I wanted to take my family with me which was just impossible. This was the day I was realizing that how much I loved my family and what do they mean to me.

When we heard the announcement for departure I was meeting all my family members and hugging them for the last time. My father hugged me and this was the second hug I have ever got from him in my life. And he said that “dear, you made me proud of you today.” These were the words I had been waiting to hear since I was born. Because I was never so attached to my father. We were never so close. We even used to talk very rarely. One of the reasons is that he never used to believe that I can ever be successful in my life and do something for my future, Which was really heartbreaking for me because I used to try so hard and sometimes I just wished to yell and tell everybody that “no, I am strong enough to do everything. I will make my own identity and I will prove it to you one day!” and it became the mission of my life to make him realize that my efforts are not fruitless. My mom was always the great supporter of me but my father didn't actually believe in education. Though he was well educated but he had became a pessimist and never used to expect anything from me. That night when I was in his arms I have no words to explain how happy and excited he was. I saw his lips spreading his charming smile all around his cheeks. His eyes were sparkling. He looked at me like I am the apple of his eye,.I could see the energy in his body that he was getting from the joy. He hugged me and I felt like I am at the most safest place in the world one can be. I still miss the comfort of that hug. Seemed like I got everything what I wanted from God and my life is complete now. I had accomplished my mission. This made me feel strong and I got inner confidence that if I can make my father to believe in something which is the toughest thing on earth, then I can do anything than why not living alone for an year.

We heard for the call for our departure and I had to leave them. I hugged them all saying good byes and they all were just looking at me till I was out of their sight and I was also keep looking back at them as much as I could.

I was thinking in my flight too about my father's mind and how I changed it. It made me to believe that if you really want to do something you just have to keep the faith and keep on trying. Efforts for good are never futile. You just have to first believe in yourself and then never loose hope. You will be successful surely.

The background of my life.

So here I just the letter which states that “Sonam, you are selected for the YES program for the US.” This was the best letter of my life. I felt like I am flying up in the air! This won't be so amazing for the rest of the students but it was so astonishing for me because my life is full of challenges. I am not like the other exchange students of Karachi (a big city of Pakistan). Want to know how's my life different?

  So, here comes my story: My life is like a fairy tale, full of surprises and miracles. My arrival to the US was really weird for me because I am not from the big city Karachi. I was actually from a small town. Five years ago I moved to Karachi.
 The small town I belonged to is full of the people who are against education. Even my own father used to believe that being a Hindu in Pakistan( that's a Muslim country) I can never be successful in any field of education. Even though my father himself is well educated but since he was living in the town with those narrow minded and pessimist people,He started thinking like them too. My mom was a little more educated than my father so she wanted me to become a doctor. But it wasn't possible in that conservative small town.

I was on the other hand being totally against the small town people, working very hard at studies and proving my interest to make my own identity. Realizing my passion for education,my mom decided to migrate to a big city in Pakistan that's called “the city of lights-Karachi”! It is a metropolitan city with great schools,colleges,beaches,malls every luxury of life. We all were really happy on the decision except my father; he didn't believe that I can become something in my future.
 He was never against my education. He always did whatever he could do to make me feel comfortable at studies. He was the one to pay all my charges for academics. He just didn't expect anything from me which was very hurting for me. Sometimes it used to feel like I am useless and the whole effort that I was giving to my studies was meaningless to him and futile. I just wanted to yell sometimes and say that “No, I'm strong enough to do it all. I will make my own identity.” But unfortunately it was also idle to do. So I just decided to prove my father wrong and do something to make him proud of me one day and it became my mission in life.

When we moved to Karachi, our family was happy but the small town people were against us. Actually, against my mom because she was the one to decide it. They were passing sarcastic comments or her and disrespecting her by saying that “This woman is dis-obedient to her husband and she is in Karachi because her relatives live there”. I knew she was suffering from all this because of me and she had no choice! I fell like I was killing her by to making her go through all this non-sense. I felt terrible and wanted to just shut those people's mouths.

Thinking about my future and the obstacles in my way, I was waiting for a miracle to happen and release me. And wow, The miracle actually happened. I got a form for a scholarship for the youth exchange and study program to the US. I wasn't confident that I would get selected.I don't know why, My mother was imagining me into the US already. I don't know how she got such confidence on me but seemed like she has seen the future. And guess what, I got selected for the program.

God has filled my life with surprises. I felt like I've got a way to rescue my mom from the evil natives of the small town. I must not forget that those people were actually my own relatives from the paternal side. They have always envious about us because none of their children are good at studies or got a chance to live in a spectacular city like Karachi.
 The basic reason behind this jealousy is illiteracy . Its actually not that the community was stopping us from live there but our own relatives were. Which made me think that friendship is better than blood relations. My life was just full of barrier. I must say that I don't know about the other kids in the world but my life was not a bed of roses. And I had to make it up for my family and myself. And this scholarship really was a shining sun in my dark days.

When the selection confirming letter came to my house,I showed it to my mom. I have no words to explain how happy and excited she was. I saw here lips spreading her beautiful smile all around her innocent face.Her eyes were filled with tears-of happiness.She looked at me like I am the apple of her eye, like I was the angel to save her in the bad times.I could see the energy in her body that she was getting from the joy. She hugged me and I felt like I am at the most safest place in the world one can be. I still miss the warmth of that hug here in America.

When the news reached to my relatives that “Sonam is going to the US”, They were all shocked and amazed that how can this happen. They are not so educated so they don't know what is an exchange program. Going to the US will may not be a big deal for you all but for an exchange program which covers all your expenses.It is a really big deal and honorable thing.For the natives of the town, it was much more enormous pleasure because none of 'em haven even thought of going to the US because its all really expensive and they used to think that education is fruitless so they never supported their children to study and get educated-Draw back of our society.

We saw a drastic change in the minds of those people after my selection.The children who used to study with me or were friends with me started fighting and blaming their parents for not permitting them to study high school.Their parents also realized the value and importance of education.It was proved to them that you can achieve a lot from education if you really try. Their thinking is totally changed now.They have started sending their children to high schools now, joining English language centers and trying to get awareness as much as they can. It was unbelievable but I really inspired them. They also want to be successful and do something for their future, which is just great. Everyone was talking about my scholarship.The best thing I ever heard was when my relatives who used to degrade my mom and say that she's wrong, told me that “your mom is the best in the world, she beard it all and made you successful" , said my relatives. Which were just wonderful. I felt like i released her. I changed people's minds which was just impossible! I heard a lot of comments while I was going through the selection process from my own cousins that "you can't get selected. You are not good enough. You are a small town girl etc. etc." But I just kept on moving with confidence and ignored all those sarcastic and meaningless remarks because its all fake. Just try and you can do anything! And I just proved that.
Those people are valuing education now, My mom is considered as the one of the most respectful ladies. And Peace is all over around me! :)
I know how YES program changes lives because it changed my life. I really wouldn't be as happy as I am not if I didn't have YES program. I highly support more spread of YES program all around Pakistan. So that it can change more lives like mine.

Introduction

Hello, I am Sonam Chawla, an exchange student from pakistan. I started blogging before the startign of my exchange year but I didn't have any idea what to blog here.
I won't say that view my blog because its awesome. I ma a great writer and you'll love my posts bla bla because that's a lie! I am terrible at vocabulary so I am not a good writer. But the advantage of my blog is that it tells the story of an exchange student, her experience, activities, US high school, American culture, culture shocks, comparison between the two cultures, the challenges that an exchange student faces  and how to cope up with a whole new world from your home. there will always be advises in each post for exchange students to make their experience successful and fruitful! which is what an exchange student looks for! :)
So if somebody is interested in knowing about exchange experiences, or even want to know that hoe we see america, you're always welcome to visit and comment or question and enjoy knowing about my exchange experience!

Regards,

SOnam CHawla
From Karachi (Pakistan) to Michigan (USA).

 I am with a bunch of exchange students from different parts of Pakistan. its the pic that we took befor eour travelling. I am the third from left at the bottom.

So here I get started!

On last Sunday we had a community service program. It was suggested to all the AFS exchange students.8 of us were there. It refreshes your mind and then you do new stuff and new things outside. We got to know many new people and got to know about many new things about the US. This is the goal of our exchange program to spread awareness and know about others too. When we told those people about our country and culture they were happy and interested to know!
It was a farm where we worked. We worked for about 5 hours on the field . We helped in taking out the crops which were ready. It was a little hard work and a lot of fun! Because "Friends are awesome.. Everything's fun with friends!".

Will keep on updating about my more community services. Enjoy reading about my exchange experience.

She cries...

I can guess that she's gonna cry when suddenly her face becomes expressionless and I can see her eyes questioning me.Her body having goosebumps and then she folds her arms and puts her head down on the table. Her face turns red and her eye lashes come over her watered eyes.As the tears roll down her cheeks they turn her cheeks and her lips rosy pink.She lifts up her head and  then moves her hair from her face using both of her hands expressing that she can't take it anymore.

I can say that she becomes more beautiful she cries..